When things fall into place

If you wait to do everything until you’re sure it’s right, you’ll probably never do much of anything.” – Win Borden

This quote really hits home with me today. If we waited until everything was perfect, we would all be in the same place as where we started. We wouldn't accomplish much and probably would all be pretty boring :) 

This quote also makes me think of Clark, he definitely likes to observe, explore and investigate before making any kind of attempt at doing ANYTHING! At one point he was so compliant having someone else hold his bottle, he never attempted to touch it! It wasn't until a wonderful friend and big time Clark/Rachel supporter  showed me how to get him to do it himself, that he finally felt confident holding the bottle.. I will always be grateful!  

First time holding his own bottle! 

Another example is , before learning to walk, he was too "good at" crawling. He would make like lightening and scoot across the floor with the speed of an Olympic speed skater. Before you knew it , he was clear across the floor, looking for something to get into.   I believe he really thought, "why would I slow down to learn something new, when I am getting there just fine":) However, once he practiced a few times, he was a pro... now he will NEVER crawl!  

First time standing on his own! 9 months old

Another  example of Clark observing, investigating, and exploring is with his ring toy. Clark has had this toy since I believe Valentine's day....and he FINALLY started to use it appropriately:) 

At first he would bite, suck and throw the rings, however, now he is putting the rings on the dowel. It amazes me every time I see him make connections, explore and make things work! 

Playing with his ring game! 

Clark has also been having some "quiet time" where he can look at books and other "quiet" items. He is too cute and funny when he looks at his favorite books. One book that he loves is Barn Yard Dance by Sandra Boynton. We gave this book as a gift to our friends new baby ( well not so new! ) of course with a lovey:) Clark would read this book to himself and also ask for me to read it whenever he gets a chance. I had to share it with others. 

Clark, "tasting" Sandra Boynton's Barn Yard Dance!
8months old

Another book, is Peek-a -boo baby. This is a great open flap book with lots of sensory textures. Clark thoroughly enjoys feeling all the bumps, teddy bear fur, and sparkly hearts.  

Clark has been really looking at the pages and treating the books with care. He loves books and I am so happy about that. 

Clark, 14 months old.  Reading " Peek -a-boo baby" 

I have been focusing my energy on this other quote.....

It has opened my eyes to a "whole new world" . I believe that the way I was living before wasn't a way that showcased my appreciation for myself . Not being concerned with drama and negativity has really helped my overall self. I am proud of where I am and where I am going... won't you join me?!?! <3


Until next time,
There is only love <3 

Adventure: Beach on a cold Sunday.....

Clark, just waking up! 

 Today, after Clark's nap we decided that we would venture out to the beach and go to the playground. Clark hasn't been to this playground since Mid- July. It was one of his favorites, it is where he first went on a swing and down the slide. When we pulled into the parking lot, he knew exactly where we were headed! He couldn't wait to get out and explore!!!

 This time around Clark was not bothered by the sand at all. He felt it , fell in it, and even tasted it! Hahahha

Attempting to "talk" his way into getting  me to let him  climb up the ropes......

Hiding under the climbing structure

 After playing for about an hour at the playground, Clark noticed some birds and seagulls near the beach. So we headed down (Veggie Chips in hand) to chase the birds and also to feed them :) Clark was trying to catch the birds, however they had other plans! At one point Clark came super close to heading into the water! I do believe he would have been a little cold, had that happened!

" Gonna git cha!" 

Run, run Clark!!! 

We had a great afternoon outdoors!  Each and every day Clark makes connections to our past, it is such a sight to see. He is really beginning to put things together and make strong connections.   Being at this playground with Clark today brought back a lot of really good memories and fun! Even in the cold and wind, we had a blast. Maybe we will venture to other places and see you there!!
Until next time,
There is only love <3

Halloween Eve!

Here was my inspiration for Clark's Halloween costume this year...

And here is the finished product:

This boy just melts my heart and makes me smile a big ol' smile. <3
Until next time,
There is only love <3

Recipe: Black bean, corn and cheese wraps ! And Corn muffins!

I have been trying to find new and exciting foods that incorporate Clark's favorite things.
One favorite food is corn and the other is cheese. Today I made
Black bean , corn and cheese wraps!  
I purchased Trader Joe's whole wheat  10-inch flour tortillas1/4 cup canned black beans, drained and rinsed

1/4 cup canned corn niblets, drained and rinsed

2 Tbsp. grated cheddar cheese

2 Tbsp. tomato salsa. In a small bowl, combine the beans, corn, cheddar and salsa, stirring to combine.

Place filling into the centre of the tortilla. Then roll it up, burrito-style with ends closed, to encase the filling.
 Toast, seam side down, in a non-stick pan over medium heat until golden brown. Repeat on other side

For a side treat, I made Corn, cheese, scallion and zucchini muffins!
Recipe:
Your favorite boxed cornbread/muffin mix or recipe (one that makes an 9-inch pan or so), I used Trader Joes Corn muffin/ bread mix.
1/2 cup grated fresh zucchini
1/2 cup canned corn, drained
1/2 cup grated cheddar cheese
Prepare the cornbread following the box instructions. Add the zucchini, corn and cheddar cheese to the dry ingredients before mixing in the wet. Continue on with the recipe as printed, baking accordingly.Trader Joes cooks at 350 for 30 minutes!
Yummy and healthy treats for me and the chunk today!!! Including foods that Clark likes into many different recipes that include spices, onions, peppers and such will allow him to try new foods and spices that he might grow up to like:)

Grate Zucchini

Oil, milk and egg

corn mixture,cheese, scallions

Finished Project!

Weekend Project.....

Clark looking for a way to hide his leaf from Mama

 I have been trying to find new and exciting toys for Clark to play with. I've never been a fan of "commercialized" products. Over the past few weeks I have been looking at different blogs that have handmade toys and products that have multi- uses. I found a really cool idea; discovery boxes.
These boxes will be separated into categories. One will be blocks, simple color free wooden blocks, another will have pinecones, another with foam pieces, another with gears or  plastic eggs, dried beans with scoops... the list is endless. This weekend I am setting out to make these boxes!! Watch out debit card:)

When I see Clark's face when he is outdoors, it warms my heart. He loves being out in nature, of course living in Massachusetts we see all the seasons! We have fields, forests, trails, oceans, ponds, rivers, city skyscapes and wind turbines, we can travel by ferry, boat, train, plane or car. We can experience Massachusetts like never before.
As a child, I played in the mud, I was out in nature whenever my parents would allow. However I was always nervous about some bugs and reptiles. I guess having Clark and wanting him to never be too nervous around things, is a way for me to get over my fears as well.

I found this section on the Last Child in the woods website: 
Fear of nature. “Don’t go in the woodpile- there’s probably snakes and god knows what else.” “Careful you don’t get stung.” “Don’t touch any plants you can’t identify, it’s probably poison ivy.” If we issue too many warnings, the kids will just give up and go inside. Nature will seem just too dangerous and not worth the trouble.

Teaching children about the natural world should be treated as one of the most important events of their lives.
-Thomas Berry


I believe that showing Clark nature now while he loves exploring will be more beneficial in the long run.  if he grows up thinking that nature isn't full of gross things, then maybe he will experience more as he grows up. I have often thought about how I do not want Clark to be one of those boys running away from a spider or bug!

Clark is teaching and showing me all kinds of new and exciting things everyday, I never thought that a child could bring so much happiness to my life.  When we feel happy, we see more good things and it becomes a self-perpetuating cycle.

I am seeing more and more good things every day and every night that make me smile from ear to ear and make me happy!  I hope one day we can share all of our fun and excitement with our friends -new and old <3
Until next time,
There is only love<3

Climbing up the "big steps" at the rock playground!

Happiness!

I have finally figured out that the world works in mysterious ways. Haha, to some of you this may not be a profound statement, you may have already realized this, but not me.
Life is a pretty amazing thing. Things happen for a reason and then you move past a certain stage in your life when it doesn't matter anymore. You mature, grow, and learn. You realize that holding grudges is old... that your heart heals its self , and that you can find happiness in other ways.

It's funny I learned these things through my son, yeah, he is 14 months old, but he sure does know a lot :)
He knows how to love, experiment, trick, investigate, and push you to your limit.But he also knows how to look at you with his big blue eyes, give you a book and sit in your lap to listen to the story.  At that moment you completely forget about everything he has done and you heart melts.

Me and Clark....gourd style!

That's how every day as been for us. We laugh, scream, argue, kiss, hug and run until we can't run anymore. Clark makes me so incredibly happy and tired! But its what I signed up for. I am thankful for each and every person in my life and Clark's life that has blessed us with support, love, and kindness. These are the things that make life worth it!
Until the next time,
There is only love <3

Hurtful words and having too much time on your hands

I still haven't figured out how people have enough time in their days to make other peoples lives miserable. I work, take care of Clark and try to maintain sanity. I don't have the time, patience, or energy to focus on making peoples lives miserable.

To go completely out of your way to cause destruction is just an awful way to be.

I try to be compassionate, empathic, sympathetic, and friendly. I know we all slip up and gossip or spread hear-say, we have all done it. But after it is out in the universe there is no way of getting it back. Not only are you showing a "catty-side" but you are creating animosity between people.

Recently, I got caught up in a similar situation. I was not the one who opened my mouth, but I was the one that got the "shit end of the stick". I was upset at first, but then I choose to use it as a learning experience. From that moment I decided to stop the cycle of rumors. I don't find it appealing or worth my time. Of course people will still talk, but its up to you (or me) to decide to just be a listener and not engage in this negative dialogue. I have found that my life is lighter and I feel good about the choices that I have made regarding this destructive behavior.

It is not up to me, or you to decide what is acceptable behavior or unacceptable behavior. We may not want to live someone elses life, but who wants to live yours (or mine)?!?!?

People every day make choices that are right for them, for their family. It is not up to someone else to decide that their lifestyle or commitments are wrong.

I tend to want to be happy for people. If they find someone to share their life with then go on and be happy. If they are looking for other aspects and are happy with their choices,it is not up to me or you to look down upon them.

I think we have to take a step back and remember that we are all human, we all make mistakes but that is what life is all about. It is about using those "mistakes" or bumps  in the road to engage in dialogue with ourselves to move forward. To learn about ourselves and  remember that all the choices you have made and the times you have avoided this negative behavior will  make you a better person.

Today, I saw the impact on an awful rumor that was started. To see someone who in my eyes is dedicated and making a life for his family, be sideswiped by someone who should have been trustworthy is just plain disgusting. 

I hope people one day can be kind... that is the kind of world I want for Clark.

Until next time,

There is only love <3

This time last year....

I was going through some pictures and found this one of the chunk...it was taken exactly one year ago today!  Crazy, right?    Clark has grown leaps and bounds! He is such a little guy now.... walking, beginning to talk, making life more interesting to those around him. 

I love watching him interact with family and friends. He has a different temperament for each person. He knows when to be subdued, when to be a bit nutty and when to gentle. I love that he can switch his temperament to engage and interact with family and friends.

I especially love watching him play at the playground. He has this one park in Arlington that has a "rock pit". He loves to collect all the little rocks and put them into a dump truck. He will sit there for an hour, placing the rocks in one by one, carefully with such technique. Occasionally looking up to see the water and the boats pass by. It's such a great, peaceful spot that we stumbled across with a friend. It is great place for picnics (it has tables and such) or a great place to sit and have coffee.  

I really have enjoyed our adventure and have found all these cool hideaways and amazing places! 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reading other blogs!

I was looking through the blogs I follow tonight to see if there were interesting recipes, fun places to visit, or anything exciting going on. I came across what has to be my most favorite post to date! 
 http://beafunmum.com/2011/10/getting-off-the-merry-go-round/
Life sometimes can be a merry-go-round, and we do have the choice to get off at anypoint, sometimes though we stay on for fear that we may disappoint others.

After reading The Happiness Project  a few months ago,I decided that it was truly time to focus on myself, what I want in my life, what makes me happy, and with my happiness how that would effect Clark and his happiness.
It definately has been a change and I have throughly enjoyed  the process!

I am my own squeaky wheel!

You never know who you may touch; just a few words can make someone’s day a little lighter.

Kindness is contagious.

And sometimes I am my own squeaky wheel…

                                                     As taken from Be A Fun Mum blog

Have you ever realized how sometimes someone can say something that instantly makes you feel better. Whether its expected or not, you just feel better. I am having more of those days. Appreciation and respect are two  things that are so important in life.
To know that you are appreciated is better than flowers, candy, or cards. Showing or TELLING someone how much they are appreciated in your life is a way to make someone feel lighter!
Being respected is something we all strive for, whether in out work setting, personal settings, relationships, etc, we want other parties to respect us. Carrying yourself well and respecting others is the key! If you don't respect someone else, how will they respect you?

I have been reflecting on my life thus far. What could I have done better? What could I have avoided? What path could I have taken? Was this path for me?
I believe that my life thus far is pretty amazing. I would take bits and pieces away - Like my  mother dying, I wish she were here to meet Clark. I think they would have gotten along famously! I believe that if she were here that she would be proud of me and the choices I have made, however she would be a constant source of support in times of need.
I do believe that all my choices have lead me to the right life for me. It lead me to Clark and that is all I need.

Sometimes I can be my own squeaky wheel and not fully engage in a moment, but I think I found the right oil to settle down my already squeakiness! Sometimes I believe that I shouldn't be as happy as I am in the moment, that there are others out there that don't have the means to be happy. But if I ruimanate and dwell on it, then I become down. Clark and I have decided that dwelling is not really for us!

Just remember when you go out into the world, Gandhi's quote " be the change you want to see in the world".  Smile, be kind and remember you never know who is doing the same thing, they might just be someone you want in your life.

Until next time,
There is only love <3

Adventure: Farm!

Super windy on the swings! 

We had a busy weekend! We went to a farm in Northbrough that I found through the Boston Mama blog.  It was a great farm that included, apple picking, pumpkin picking, a huge playground and several small petting zoos. Clark was in big boy heaven with the playground. They had cool tires that he could climb threw, and attempt to climb on. There were swings and slides and of course an old tractor. Clark gravitated over to the tractor within seconds of getting out of his carriage.  He insisted on checking out the wheel and the undercarriage before trying to " climb" into the seat.  It was so cute I had to take a picture!

After the farm we went to check out the new Wegman's in Northborough! Of course there is a method behind my madness! Clark did ok in the store... being the grand opening weekend, he survived the mayham! 

I refelected that night on how much fun we had at the farm and going on an adventure. The more time I am able to devote to Clark the more whole I become. He is such a joy and love ! It is sad that time flies by so fast, within a few years he will be in school full time. I try not to think about that, and enjoy the process of NOW!

How some adults view children.....

Rachel Carson
"A child’s world is fresh and new and beautiful, full of wonder and excitement. It is our misfortune that for most of us that clear-eyed vision, that true instinct for what is beautiful, is dimmed and even lost  before we reach adulthood."

Today, Clark and I met our good friends Kelly and James for an early morning breakfast. Great company, great food and wonderful conversation was had. Clark was his typical self... engaged in play with his lovey, while eating some scrumcious banana pancakes.
I will rewind a bit, we decided to meet at Stella's-- a very " homey, welcoming restaurant" that daily feeds numerous children and welcomes them with open arms. This is a great restaurant for people with children.
Ok, back to the story. We are sitting there all enjoying our morning conversations, getting caught up, talking with James about school and the such.
Clark is being very good, occassionally turning in his highchair to see the people across from us. When doing this the two women shot him this awful look. It was quite disgusting. I turned him around and started to show him some toys and things. Not only did I witness this, Kelly did as well as the waitress.  Over the course of our meal Clark was trying to engage them in play. Throwing his lovey near them to which they stepped on it! I could not imgaine what a horrible life that these two had that they wouldn't just leave the toy alone or pass it to me. I grabbed it from underneath her foot and said, "I understand you may not like children this early in the morning or most likely at all, but you are at a resturant that welcomes children of all ages, apparently because you two are the biggest children I have ever met. My son my not be the best behaved sitting here but for a 14 month old, he is pretty freaking good. So please  do excuse me while I go back to my lovely meal and hopefully you to can go out and enjoy this beautiful day."
I was shocked that I even said anything to them! But I did. This new life I am leading as made me stop and realize , when the hell did the world get to be so rude? arrogant? disrespectful? and lost its excitement and happiness? Is it just me? 
I'm sure many of you reading this will think, why didn't I just take the lovey away from Clark? Could I have left the restaurant?  I could have, but honestly he wasn't at all bad for his age. He ate a great portion of his pancake, had some milk and was pointing to all the fall/ pumpkin decorations in the place. 

I don't know about you , but I am excited when I see children, sometimes it can be overwhelming but I would never ever be so rude to someone elses child. Sometimes I think people need to take a step back and remember that at one time they were children. Take a minute to enjoy the moment... find happiness in one thing that a child might be doing.... maybe it will make you smile for just a moment.

Until the next time,
There is only love <3

My heart just melted....

When Clark was born he loved resting on my chest and bouncing on an exercise ball. It was the only way I could get Clark to relax and take a nap. While bouncing on the ball I would sing him a song. The song was pretty generic, " Goodnight Mama, Goodnight Mama, goodnight Mama its time to go to sleep". I would sing the song for each and every main person in Clark's life. From grandparents, to aunts, to uncles, to great friends; Clark would hear their names and even we would include his dear friend " Lovey" -a blanket giraffe.  At the every end of the song I would sing Clark's name . Then I would lay him in his crib with Lovey. This was a nightly routine that Clark loved.
Tonight, Clark was very upset. I think with me working more hours and him going through teething as well as having a little cold he wanted to bounce and feel connected to me. This was something that he hasn't really wanted to do in a while. I sat on the ball and began bouncing. Soon after I began singing everyone's name like I had done in the past. Clark placed his head on my chest, while clutching lovey and I could feel him completely relax in my arms.
In that moment, I realized that everything I do in life, I do for him. I want to protect him, love him, and cherish each and every moment with him. I sat there with him for about 20 minutes, boucning and singing and loving each and every moment- his smell, his weight, the way his hair brushed my face... my heart just melted.

"Children are born naturalists. They explore the world with all of their senses, experiment in the environment, and communicate their discoveries to those around them." taken from The Audubon Nature Preschool

Clark and I were ready for our walk. But nature took its course and our walk turned into a leisurely stroll that took quite a bit of time to even leave the yard. Clark found one lonely red leaf laying in the garden. He picked it up and began observing it. He was touching the points, rubbing the veins, and then smelled it.  He used all of his senses to take in his world around him. 
This was such a wonderful moment for us to share.  I have a favorite quote " It doesn't matter how long it takes, as long as you don't stop" . This summed up our afternoon! 

Until next time,
There is only love <3

Out of comfort zone AGAIN!

This week has been great! My energy level has been really high, which is great for the upcoming weekend. Looking at the weather I am noticing that its going to be pretty warm out there.
I have been thinking about things to do with the chunk . One thing was to go to Wilson's farm and check out all of the vegetables and fruits....as well as all the amazing Fall harvest sights!

Well I am stepping out of my comfort zone by enrolling Clark in a nursery school program. It's just one day a week and I will be there, but its still very nerve wracking!  I decided to start looking at schools that stepped away from the traditional education philosophy. I believe,when look at Clark that he needs alot of time out doors- experiencing nature, seeing how things work,and  learning through movement. I decided that I would take part in a 6 weeks session at the Waldorf School in Lexington. I believe that they really encompass my thoughts on education by letting children learn through play with organic materials.

I have finally come to terms with the fact that I have a rough and tumble kinda boy and I have been loving every single minute of it.
Because of his energy level, I have been very mindful of getting out and enjoying the day with Clark. This has been very helpful! I have lost a total of 19 pounds!!!

Now... trying to find some new foods for the chunk, that's a different story. This weekend I am going to try to make some mini meatloaf "muffins" with corn and carrots inside with mashed cauliflower . We shall see how the chunk likes that.


Until next time,
There is only love <3