Ringing in the New Year

When I was younger, my parents would have huge parties at our house for New Year's eve. Food was always outdone, chatting, laughing and watching the ball drop was so much fun! Our parent's friends would be there and most of them had kids our age. While our parents were socializing, Ian and I would be with our friends playing games and munching on all kids of food.
A few minutes before midnight my mother would gather everyone outside, all armed with pots, pans and all kinds of cooking utensils. When we were given the word  (at the strike of midnight) we would bang the crap out of those pans. The neighbors would all be shouting and clapping and knew exactly where the noise was coming from.
We would have so much fun and lots of laughs! After a few minutes we would all go back in the house.

I think its because I am getting older, but I miss those moments.I miss having crowds over, food over flowing, laughs and great memories. I guess its all a part of growing up...  but my resolution is to have more of those moments.

So here is to everyone out there feeling the same way....  Happy New Year's!
Until next time,
There is only love <3

Process of evolving ..What a year!

New year....new hair! 

Over the past year there have been hurdles, triumphs, loss, rekindled friendships, sicknesses, health and of course love. Just when you think you have life figured out curve balls come your way. But it is up to you to decide if those curve balls are going to take you out or if you will keep on dodging them . I choose to dodge them this year! I think I am ending this year on a particularly good note, in my humble opinion :)

Clark has made significant strides in all aspects of life thus far. He is walking, learning to communicate - although I wish " ba---ba--- ba" wasn't used to describe everything he wants, :) He is into creating new things, watching how machines move. He has absolutely loved the decorations that are out for the holidays! I do believe I will be that person that decorates for all " holidays"..... They do make egg lights, right?!?! :)

He is such a fun loving  boy! He can melt your heart and make your blood boil all in one whack, but I wouldn't want it any other way. He has taught me how to love unconditionally, how to forgive and forget and also how to communicate in a positive way. He has showed me how to slow down, enjoy life on my terms, have fun, and sometimes just laugh and smile. He has given me so much drive and ambition. It's funny how a 17 month old can show an adult the way to live. Clark and I have found our groove! We can sing songs, roll around on the bed, play with trucks and cars, or rock the babies to sleep. He is the most important and best thing in my life.

FAMILY

This time last year, my father was very ill. He has since had open heart surgery. Which was a success but he  has had some set backs recently  in his recovery. He is taking it day by day. I am hoping that the year treats him right and we can move on from his illness. I really would love to see my dad back to were he was - he has lost a bit of his spunk, ambition and youthfulness. 

This year, I have started back to work. Going from only watching Clark to a "part time" job, ( I haven't seen the low side of 20 hours since the second week into the job!) Has been tough work. I sometimes feel that I am not spending enough time with Clark. But deep down I know that the separation is good for the both of us. That this makes the time we do spend together that much greater.  I am looking into several schools for Clark for the upcoming year. I love that he gets to spend so much time with Na- Na and Grampie Jim, but I know that it would be great for him to be around other children a few days a week. This is a major decision that I have made.... we shall see how it turns out! I am excited about the process and how Clark will evolve even more and make some buddies! Also, I really am looking forward to his first " project" at school!!!

Working has been really good for my whole self . I feel appreciated , respected and I have fun ( most days!) 

I have decided to go back to school and take a few classes so that I can become director certified for the state. I know my passion is being in the classroom - but for now I am really happy working outside of the classroom in a more office type environment. I never would have guessed that I would enjoy that type of work. But I guess the saying is true.... people can change. 

I am looking forward to 2012 being a great year. A year filled with friendships, love, a good health. 

Until next time,

There is only love <3 

The Nutcracker

On Wednesday night I had the pleasure of going to see the Nutcracker performed by the Boston Ballet with a great friend. The night was amazing and the show was spectacular! There is something to be said for a night out with a friend who truly in every sense of the word "gets you".  Sharing and evening of laughter, conversation and a fantastic show was just what I needed this holiday season.

Last time I saw the Nutcracker I was probably in highschool, my mother made it a point to take me to the Nutcracker every year since I can remember. Getting all dressed up to go to the theatre was such a thrill. It is memories like that, that I hold dear to my heart.

Around this time of year I miss my mother alot more than other days. She loved the Christmas holiday and would be caught decorating the house right after cleaning up the turkey from Thanksgiving! The decorations would be up until January 6th (Little Christmas! and my dad's birthday). Christmas songs would be playing and the oven, I don't believe was ever off... she would make cookies, candies, and treats galore! 
 I still use several recipes that were my mothers for my own holiday treats. The smell of ainse cookies baking in the oven makes me daydream of the closeness my mother and I shared, especially our love for the holidays.
I know that if my mother was around she would have loved to see Clark's face when he looks at lights and decorations.
 I also know that if she were alive she would have been sitting in the Boston Opera House chatting away with my friend, because they would have gotten along famously. 

I have often asked myself, where have certain people been all my life.... usually their response is
" hiding"... well this holiday season, I am saying " I am glad I found you... even if it took sometime and some detours". 
Until next time,
There is only love <3

Starbucks....sentimental cups

As the world is probably aware I love starbucks. I once wrote about it in goodbye letter to my Ithaca friends. It sounds weird, but Starbucks as been a wonderful place for me. My mother and I first went to Starbucks in Seattle back in 1997. After that I was pretty much done for.....

Over the past several years I have found a Starbucks on travels, I have made new friends over the course of sipping coffee, I have read books, and now I am able to take Clark and have a snack with my chunk.

It's funny how coffee brings people together, it makes you feel good. Whether enjoying it alone or with an amazing person across from you. 

I love the new cups they have for the holidays. It makes me get in the holiday spirit and really think about the people that are in my life. Sometimes all it takes is a moment to remember why we invest in other people, why those people make us happy, why they are constantly caring and helping, and why ultimately we have them in our lives. 

Let's remember why we go together so well.

So, I ask you....try to remember why we go together so well <3
Until next time,
There is only love <3

Joy!

My chunk <3

It is amazing when a child gets  a new toy and you see them light up. A friend of mine gave Clark some " hand me down" toys -- in the box was two different kinds of trains, a farm (that plays music) and a sorting game.
He loved them all, but the trains really got his attention! He started laughing so much when he heard the sound that one made. He has been playing for hours at Na- na's house! He even slept with one train for the past few nights. 
However, he decided that 4:45am was a great time to wake up to play with his trains on Monday morning.... We had a difference of opinions that day :)
But in the end, he was happy, I couldn't stop laughing at his giddiness over the trains. 
Although, I was mad a first to be up so early, knowing I had such a long work day ahead of me, I realized that at some point, I am going to miss his excitement, the joy he has for all these new experiences he is taken in-- for one day it will all be just a memory.

Until next time,
There is only love<3

You're going to miss this......

December 2010 , Clark Henry( and lovey) , 4 months old with his playgroup friends! 

You're going to miss this
You're going to want this back
You're going to wish these days
Hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're going to miss this

--Trace Adkins 

 I heard this song today and it seriously brought a tear to my eye. We are always rushing around, wanting the next thing to happen. But whatever happened to living in the moment?
Taking life one second at a time can be so helpful, instead of rushing through an experience , we should take each moment and live it to the fullest. 

Whether it is watching our children, developing a new relationship, enjoying the weather, sipping on a new coffee drink... we should relish in the moment and not worry about that moment ending or the new moments that are around the bend. 

Because in the end, when you don't have that moment, person or place in your life... you're going to miss it. 

I am guilty of wish my life away... but I am trying to just enjoy these moments as they happen. Enjoying these moments have put a smile on my face that I could never have imagined. I am the happiest I have been in a long time. So I thank you... 

Until next time, 

There is only love <3 

Ithaca, New York. Clark Henry 7 months old 

Father's Day, June 2011 . Clark Henry 10 months old! 

Recipe: Pumpkin cupcakes!

I was recently asked to find a pumpkin cupcake recipe for the preschool classroom. I stumbled upon this recipe and got way to excited! I have never heard about these Fun Da- middle box cupcake mix, but I surely had to find out where I could find them! I found them at Target and decided tonight was the night to give them a whirl. 

What I really liked about this recipe was the fact that they use pumpkin to give it some extra spice! 

Ingredients

• 12 paper baking cups
• 1 box Fun Da-Middles yellow cupcake mix with creamy vanilla filling
• 3/4 cup water
• 1/3 cup canned pumpkin
• 2  eggs
• 2 tsp pumpkin pie spice
• maple syrup (optional)
• pecan pieces (for sprinkling)

Directions

Secret mixture! 

Preheat oven to 350 degrees . Line cupcake tin with paper baking cups and set aside.

In a large bowl, beat together cupcake mix, water, canned pumpkin, eggs and pumpkin pie spice on low speed for 30 seconds, then on medium speed 2 minutes, scraping bowl occasionally.

2 eggs, canned organic pumpkin and water 

Mixture with eggs, water and canned organic pumpkin

Whipping mixture with a small whisk. 

Fill each baking cup 1/3 of the way, making sure batter completely covers the bottom. Set remaining batter aside.

Pumpkin cupcakes in paper liners

Squeeze filling pouch 20 times, then cut off corner of pouch at cut line and divide filling equally among the cupcakes by squeezing a small amount in the center, making sure filling does not touch sides. Use all the filling.

Mixture with a dollop of cream 

1. 
   
2. Place a small dollop of maple syrup on top of the filling, if desired. Scoop the remaining batter evenly over the filled cupcakes, making sure the filling is completely covered. Top with pecan pieces and lightly press down into batter, if desired.
3. 
   
   
   
   Bake according to package instructions (about 24 to 29 minutes). Remove from oven and allow to cool at least 20 minutes before eating or removing from pan.

Warm pumpkin cupcakes with vanilla cream! 

These muffins were very yummy and different. Making the again, I would add a bit more pumpkin. Pairing this cupcake with a nice freshly brewed cup of coffee would be a great treat on a cool autumn night! 

Recipe: Gypsy Soup !

It seems like alot of people I know are sick. I have a little nasal congestion, but it isn't as bad as some colds that people are getting. 

Anytime I was sick growing up I have fond memories of my mother whipping up a quick, hearty soup - that would surely kick the crap out of any cold. Usually it was chicken soup..which to this date the only person that comes close to making it a similar way is my grandmother. 

Why was it that anytime we were sick there seemed to always be a left over whole chicken waiting to be chopped up and made into a delicious soup?! I will never know why... but it sure did taste good. Whether she would make it with rice, pasta, or noodles, the cold see to disappear within hours. 

I am a big fan of making soup and giving soup. If I find a recipe that I find to be beneficial of cooking and sharing I most certainly will share the wealth! (or soup for that matter!)
So, needless to say, I have been very productive in my soup making skills. When someone is ill or fighting off a cold, my first reaction is to make soup! Haha!! I have made chicken soup and vegetable soup the past few weeks.

 But today I remembered this yummy soup that my mother made from the Moosewood Cookbook.  

Gypsy Soup!!!  I had to make it for all of the sickies out there! Including myself:)

Here are the ingredients:  

3-4 tablespoons olive oil
2 cups chopped onion
2 cloves crushed garlic
2 cups chopped, peeled sweet potatoes or  carrots ( I added both)
1/2 cup chopped celery ( I omitted, added mushrooms instead)
1 cup chopped fresh tomatoes
3/4 cup chopped sweet peppers ( I omitted, added green beans and peas)
1-1/2 cups cooked chickpeas (Used white kidney beans, as that is all I had)
3 cups water
Dash of cinnamon, dash of cayenne
1 bay leaf
1 tablespoon tamaric
2 teaspoon paprika
1 teaspoon turmeric
1 teaspoon basil
1 teaspoon salt

To start: 

In a soup kettle sauté  garlic,  and sweet potatoes in olive oil for about 5 minutes.

  

Carrots, mushroom, peas sauteing in extra virgin olive oil  

Add seasonings, except the tamaric, and the stock or water. Simmer, covered for 15 minutes.

I took the tomatoes plunged them into the boiling 3 cups of water, once they were soft, I diced them up . Cooked for another 5 or so minutes. Then strained out the tomatoes and used the tomato broth in with the vegetables.

3 cups of water with chopped tomatoes 

Strained the tomatoes and used the "tomato broth" as the water 

Vegetables with seasoning 

Add remaining vegetables and cooked chickpeas. Simmer another 10 minutes or so until all the vegetables are as tender as you like them.

Gypsy Soup! 

Please Note: the vegetables used in this soup are flexible. Any orange vegetable can be combined with green. For example, peas or green beans can replace the peppers. Carrots can be used instead of or in addition to the squash or sweet potatoes.

So, please do remember to be kind to others and to help when they are feeling sick! It is a great feeling to know that you are helping someone to feel better, just by making a simple soup.

Until next time, 

There is only love <3 

:)

There are moments in my life, when I wonder how I got along before Clark was born. His sense of curiosity, love, and humor is in my eyes, the best. The happiness that is exuded when I see him at the end of my long work day  is such an unconditional feeling. He reciprocates with his usual run, hug and smile. That smile can melt away any stress from the day.
A few nights ago, he wanted me to read him a story, when I wasn't fast enough to sit with him, he decided to read to himself. This is what I walked in on......

Clark thought bubble would say.....

 

 

" I'll have to remember that"

The vision of Clark reading "The Happiest Toddler on the Block" was just to funny not to capture!
These are the moments where I sit back and laugh at the things he does.

I decided this year to make simple notecards with one of Clark's paintings. I will include a small picture of Clark for family and friends. Usually, I would have been to the portrait studio a bunch of times, trying to capture his best side, then mulling over which would be the best to send out. This year I am going the simple route. I have found that simple is better in many circumstances over the past few months.  Clark used watercolors to paint his picture! I can not wait to see the end result! 

When painting Clark was exploring the colors, texture of the bristles on the brushes, and of course tasting the watercolor. I use liquid watercolors for a more vibrant color palette. Clark seemed to really enjoy the process... and in the end it is about the process not the product. We had a great time painting and laughing at the drops that would fall on the paper and the sound that would occur when such a drop happened. (  Ie, Mama saying " pppppplop! pppppplop! ppppplop!" )

Painting and exploring on a Sunday afternoon!

My joy other than Clark is to create, to paint, to use my creativity to produce something. I love that Clark at this moment enjoys those things as well.

Until next time,
There is only love <3

Somedays just suck... but its up to you to find the bright spot.

This new life has definately made for some really great days, and usually I can overlook crappy spots in an overall good day. However today, everything just about sucks.
Have you ever wanted to just disappear? Or hide under a rock and let a lifetime pass you by? Yeah, that is my day today.
It started with a bad cup of tea... proceeded by me hitting a car from behind. I hit my face off the steering wheel but no real injuries occured. My car on the other hand is a mess. The only good thing out of it was that my chunk wasn't with me. I don't know what I would have done if anything happened to him. He is the best thing that ever happened to me, something told me to let him stay home and I am glad I listened.

Its pretty sad when only a select few people ask if you are alright, and tell you over and over again that its just a material possession. That your life, your safety matters more than a tin piece of crap. Getting to Mirak in my loud dragging car, and having the parts guy/ a really great friend  John,  look at me with genuine caring/concerned eye and ask if I was ok, meant so much to me.
When you have an accident (not that mine was that bad at all), you put things into perspective and realize that some people are kinder than others. Some people matter more and are worthy of your time and attention.  You realize any stupid arguement or hiccup in the road of life may just infact lead you back where you should be.  Moreover, you think about where your life is headed and who you want to take with you. Again, the great part of life is that the past can be the past. You can have arguements and hiccups, but what makes it great is that to move on to the future, you don't have to carry all that shit around .You can take bits, pieces, segments, and certain people and move forward. The past doesn't have to define you, but it can help to create a new you, a new life that is fullfilling and exciting.
I realize that I want more of those people in my life. The people that actually want you in their life for nothing other than to make them smile, to have a listening ear, to laugh at their bad jokes, to enjoy coffee together while making fun of the guy with the weird voice, and to overall have a relationship that is a give and take.

Giving and taking is what makes a relationship work- not just a sexual relationship, but that of a friend. You have to have a reciprocal relationship- if not then you just feel walked over.
I'm sick of being walked over. So aside from this sucky day, I found a few bright spots in it. Wow,...who would have thought that I could at the end of the day with tears streaming down my face have a smile and be thinking of moments when this day wasn't all that bad.

Until next time,
There is only love<3

Letting your child be the person that they are.....

"Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower " Albert Camus 

Fall is my most favorite season! This quote really speaks volumes when it comes to showcasing what the magic of the season really is. The mornings are cool and the nights are chilly. The air hits your cheeks and you are reminded that as Valerie Andrews stated, "As a child, one has that magical capacity to move among the many eras of the earth; to see the land as an animal does; to experience the sky from the perspective of a flower or a bee; to feel the earth quiver and breathe beneath us; to know a hundred different smells of mud and listen unself- consciously to the soughing of the trees."

Imagine what it is like to really take in all of your surroundings, as your child does. Clark loves to stop, look and listen to all that is around him. Thus, providing me a moment to stop, reflect and listen to the world around me. 

In a past blog I talked about taking a moment at the end of the day to reflect upon your day- what was good, bad, and what could have been done differently. Pairing these two reflective qualities together has been very beneficial. 

Instead of rushing through the day, I stop and pause to enjoy the "little things" with Clark.  These things aren't so little when I look at Clark's growth. Seeing how he engulfs his whole self into the environment, warms my heart. I look at him playing in the mud, digging for worms, chasing birds, watching airplanes, looking at all sorts of trucks, and observing the veins of falling leaves, and cleaning up the street with Nana. These things show me that I am doing a great job proving Clark with literacy- rich and hands-on environmental experiences. 

Last weekend I took part in a wonderful conference about Diet and Development in the 21st century. The workshop was great, however it made me think ...well overthink and analyze and process Clark, his behavior and what I feed him.

That being said, I have been focusing my energy on a 30 day plan. This plan will include only organic vegetables, meats, and fruits in our diet. I want to see if this way of eating for both Clark and I will affect our behavior ( mostly Clark at this moment:). I have found that making treats for Clark is a good way to cut out processed foods, artificial colors, and other not so good things for him. I am in no way pushing this way of eating but I want to see, is there a correlation between non-organic foods and behavior? 

Or when it comes right down to it... Is my son an absolute normal 15 month old boy that has more energy than he knows what to do with ? 

So that is the question I am posing for today.....

I want the best for my son, always. But I am really tired of the criticism that I receive when people see him. In my opinion my son doesn't have ADHD. He is a 15 month old little boy that has the best energy going. He is loving, sweet and can melt your heart the moment he looks at you. He can be engaged with books, toys, and household items, but sometimes he wants to just be a rough and tumble kind of guy. Is that wrong? Should I reprimand him? 

Or just let him be him.... Because in the end, I am choosing to let him be him. A fun loving, free spirit.... maybe you will join us on this adventure.

Until next time,
There is only love<3

When things fall into place

If you wait to do everything until you’re sure it’s right, you’ll probably never do much of anything.” – Win Borden

This quote really hits home with me today. If we waited until everything was perfect, we would all be in the same place as where we started. We wouldn't accomplish much and probably would all be pretty boring :) 

This quote also makes me think of Clark, he definitely likes to observe, explore and investigate before making any kind of attempt at doing ANYTHING! At one point he was so compliant having someone else hold his bottle, he never attempted to touch it! It wasn't until a wonderful friend and big time Clark/Rachel supporter  showed me how to get him to do it himself, that he finally felt confident holding the bottle.. I will always be grateful!  

First time holding his own bottle! 

Another example is , before learning to walk, he was too "good at" crawling. He would make like lightening and scoot across the floor with the speed of an Olympic speed skater. Before you knew it , he was clear across the floor, looking for something to get into.   I believe he really thought, "why would I slow down to learn something new, when I am getting there just fine":) However, once he practiced a few times, he was a pro... now he will NEVER crawl!  

First time standing on his own! 9 months old

Another  example of Clark observing, investigating, and exploring is with his ring toy. Clark has had this toy since I believe Valentine's day....and he FINALLY started to use it appropriately:) 

At first he would bite, suck and throw the rings, however, now he is putting the rings on the dowel. It amazes me every time I see him make connections, explore and make things work! 

Playing with his ring game! 

Clark has also been having some "quiet time" where he can look at books and other "quiet" items. He is too cute and funny when he looks at his favorite books. One book that he loves is Barn Yard Dance by Sandra Boynton. We gave this book as a gift to our friends new baby ( well not so new! ) of course with a lovey:) Clark would read this book to himself and also ask for me to read it whenever he gets a chance. I had to share it with others. 

Clark, "tasting" Sandra Boynton's Barn Yard Dance!
8months old

Another book, is Peek-a -boo baby. This is a great open flap book with lots of sensory textures. Clark thoroughly enjoys feeling all the bumps, teddy bear fur, and sparkly hearts.  

Clark has been really looking at the pages and treating the books with care. He loves books and I am so happy about that. 

Clark, 14 months old.  Reading " Peek -a-boo baby" 

I have been focusing my energy on this other quote.....

It has opened my eyes to a "whole new world" . I believe that the way I was living before wasn't a way that showcased my appreciation for myself . Not being concerned with drama and negativity has really helped my overall self. I am proud of where I am and where I am going... won't you join me?!?! <3


Until next time,
There is only love <3 

Adventure: Beach on a cold Sunday.....

Clark, just waking up! 

 Today, after Clark's nap we decided that we would venture out to the beach and go to the playground. Clark hasn't been to this playground since Mid- July. It was one of his favorites, it is where he first went on a swing and down the slide. When we pulled into the parking lot, he knew exactly where we were headed! He couldn't wait to get out and explore!!!

 This time around Clark was not bothered by the sand at all. He felt it , fell in it, and even tasted it! Hahahha

Attempting to "talk" his way into getting  me to let him  climb up the ropes......

Hiding under the climbing structure

 After playing for about an hour at the playground, Clark noticed some birds and seagulls near the beach. So we headed down (Veggie Chips in hand) to chase the birds and also to feed them :) Clark was trying to catch the birds, however they had other plans! At one point Clark came super close to heading into the water! I do believe he would have been a little cold, had that happened!

" Gonna git cha!" 

Run, run Clark!!! 

We had a great afternoon outdoors!  Each and every day Clark makes connections to our past, it is such a sight to see. He is really beginning to put things together and make strong connections.   Being at this playground with Clark today brought back a lot of really good memories and fun! Even in the cold and wind, we had a blast. Maybe we will venture to other places and see you there!!
Until next time,
There is only love <3

Halloween Eve!

Here was my inspiration for Clark's Halloween costume this year...

And here is the finished product:

This boy just melts my heart and makes me smile a big ol' smile. <3
Until next time,
There is only love <3

Recipe: Black bean, corn and cheese wraps ! And Corn muffins!

I have been trying to find new and exciting foods that incorporate Clark's favorite things.
One favorite food is corn and the other is cheese. Today I made
Black bean , corn and cheese wraps!  
I purchased Trader Joe's whole wheat  10-inch flour tortillas1/4 cup canned black beans, drained and rinsed

1/4 cup canned corn niblets, drained and rinsed

2 Tbsp. grated cheddar cheese

2 Tbsp. tomato salsa. In a small bowl, combine the beans, corn, cheddar and salsa, stirring to combine.

Place filling into the centre of the tortilla. Then roll it up, burrito-style with ends closed, to encase the filling.
 Toast, seam side down, in a non-stick pan over medium heat until golden brown. Repeat on other side

For a side treat, I made Corn, cheese, scallion and zucchini muffins!
Recipe:
Your favorite boxed cornbread/muffin mix or recipe (one that makes an 9-inch pan or so), I used Trader Joes Corn muffin/ bread mix.
1/2 cup grated fresh zucchini
1/2 cup canned corn, drained
1/2 cup grated cheddar cheese
Prepare the cornbread following the box instructions. Add the zucchini, corn and cheddar cheese to the dry ingredients before mixing in the wet. Continue on with the recipe as printed, baking accordingly.Trader Joes cooks at 350 for 30 minutes!
Yummy and healthy treats for me and the chunk today!!! Including foods that Clark likes into many different recipes that include spices, onions, peppers and such will allow him to try new foods and spices that he might grow up to like:)

Grate Zucchini

Oil, milk and egg

corn mixture,cheese, scallions

Finished Project!